January 2023...Thailand...interrupted by Poland

And as winter settled in, five days into the new year, it was time to leave Seattle and head to warmer weather. And so after saying farewell to these lovely people above, it was back to Thailand via Seoul on Korean and after a couple of days in Chiang Mai onward to Maehongson. One unique thing I had never experienced before was that our flight path from Seoul to Chiang Mai took us literally over (or so close by) that I could see the lights of Shanghai, Hong Kong, Hanoi and Luang Prabang! I thought this was very cool!

Back to some of my favorite views in Maehongson.

Note, cool season blue sky still evident!

Ironically...after being in Seattle for the nine months last year, months that sometimes dragged on, when I would have been happy to travel anywhere for work...ironically, I was just getting over jetlag (I hadn't even been in Thailand a week yet!) when I received a call asking if I would be willing to go support a team from Ukraine that was having a logistics and planning week in Poland and they wanted some mental health support on the side. While the timing wasn't ideal, this is the life I have and the life I want - to be able to have the freedom to travel when needed to support the mental and emotional health of people working to make the world a better place. So my January airport passthroughs grew from SEA-ICN-CNX- HGN to include HGN-DMK-BKK-MUC-KRK-VIE-BKK-DMK-HGN! Whew! And I traded in my views above for...

View of Wawel Castle from my hotel window

It was a good week (hello, any new travel adventure tends to be a good thing:-)) and it is always a privilege anytime I am invited to provide even a small amount of psychological support and resilience to individuals in difficult places who are trying to make the world a safer, healthier place. And as with every conflict when you know names and faces, it makes it that much more real. It was no different with this team. Some had sons and husbands actively fighting. All live with the daily reality of trauma and uncertainty.

Yet they were meeting to actively plan and coordinate what must happen for Ukraine's health system to be restored after the war is over. Safety and job security must be guaranteed. Infrastructure must be rebuilt. These are necessary for doctors and other health professionals to even hope to return. And only then will the real work happen of attending to a country traumatized by aggression, to soldiers who will carry the literal and psychological scars and wounds of war and PTSD. Addiction of various forms will skyrocket. And the general health of a population that has not received regular check ups and care will need to be considered.

This team has been part of planning for the unimaginable reality of nuclear weapons being used against their cities. How do you plan for this threat, for mass casualties, for thousands of deaths and even more thousands dying slowing of radiation and whatever other destruction nuclear weapons unleash? I don't know - but they show up for work every day, determined to not let evil win.

Lies and misinformation are real. As are monsters. As is evil. All very real threats to their country and to the world, whatever country we live in. And, in the face of this evil, courage and resilience are also very real. Kindness is real. Bare knuckling grit and resolve to get the job done are real.

Today as write, I remember the courage of those fighting for their survival in Ukraine. Sláva Ukrayíni!

Though January is still the end of the 'cool' season in Thailand it was much warmer than either Seattle or freezing snowy Krakow! In spite of the cold, I ventured out as much as I could to see a little bit of the city. I told my taxi driver when I arrived that I was literally clueless knowing nothing. Poland wasn't on my must get to list of places in the world. Medieval Krakow is Poland's second largest city (though it doesn't feel like a large city) and still Poland's cultural hub and significant tourist attraction. I did know it was the birthplace of Pope John Paul II and you can still pass by the house he live and I attended a beautiful but freezing concert in the 400 year old church his parents were married in. And of course Auschwitz is only about 30 miles away. Though life continues as normal, it is sobering to feel the weight of history pushing up against the reality that is happening across the border in Ukraine.

Seattle Summer - Fall/Autumn - And a taste of Winter...

 A few reminders but mainly the colors of the seasons...

For many of the nine months in Seattle I kept my eye on these two as they sat on, hatched and cared for their one eaglet this year. They've roosted in this tree for many years. They are good parents even when their kid is learning how to fly - whew there were some parental moments and lessons as he swooped and fluttered and sometimes missed, falling and clawing his way back onto a branch. 

Most every day I would do a 2-2 1/2 mile loop down the hill and around Alki. In nine months of doing this loop, I only ran into someone I knew (the same person) twice! But the sky and the sea were always there - never the same...always changing. Always beautiful. 

Lilies taller than she is...

Homegrown...

And one day all the phaleonopsis got it together and coordinated. 

And the Dahlia's were large and in charge and always spectacular.

So I said I never ran into anyone I knew on my two mile loop - but, there was one friend that I made who was there many many days (maybe 50% of the time) waiting to say hi to me and to all the other walkers that would go past his house and down the steps to the beach. Meet Mochi - beloved neighbor cat who would walk with his many friends up and down the stairs and loved to chase any stick or string or leaf you might have. 

Words that have Sustained - Part 4 - Lent 2022

Round Four of Words that have Sustained - Lent 2022...Prayers and Possibilities...

Phraya Nakhon Cave, Sam Roi Yot National Park, Prachuap Khiri Khan.

3/1

To answer your question,
Yes.

You will die a few more deaths
before your final chapter.

You will stare at the ceiling of
one tomb or another, feel the
gushing roaring ache of
absence.

Don’t let fear become more than
the occasional tightness at the
back of your throat, a
fluttering in the ribcage.

The first death shaped your hands into keys
your shoulder blades into wings
and your heart into a book of poems
that will always remember
the way out.

The first death gave you Life.
Do not lay it down.

- Christa Wells

Posting a couple more shots of Phraya Nakhon Cave because it captures the mood so well.

3/2

Keeping the heart open, even in hell, makes space for the Beloved. It is in the darkest nights of our souls, when all we know is that we know nothing, that the presence of the sacred may quietly well up, mingling with our pain and connecting us to a love that will never die.

Mirabai Starr, WILD MERCY: Living the Fierce and Tender Wisdom of the Women Mystics (H/T Christa Wells)

Old steps leading from Wat Phra Non up to Wat Doi KongMu, Maehongson.

3/3

A Prayer

Refuse to fall down
If you cannot refuse to fall down,
refuse to stay down.
If you cannot refuse to stay down,
lift your heart toward heaven,
and like a hungry beggar,
ask that it be filled.
You may be pushed down.
You may be kept from rising.
But no one can keep you from lifting your heart
toward heaven
only you.
It is in the middle of misery
that so much becomes clear.
The one who says nothing good
came of this,
is not yet listening.

- clarissa pinkola estes

While I agree with the last three lines of this poem, only the person going through the suffering/hard time gets to say that to themselves. No one else has the right or should be foolish enough to say that to another person. If they do, they deserve what they get in return!

Maehongson, view from the other angle of the previous photo.

3/4

In our day to day lives, we often show courage without realizing it. However, it is only when we are afraid that courage becomes a question. Courage is amazing because it can tap into the heart of fear, taking that frightened energy and turning it towards initiative, creativity, action and hope. When courage comes alive, imprisoning walls become frontiers of new possibility, difficulty becomes invitation and the heart comes into a new rhythm of trust and sureness. There are secret sources of courage inside every human heart; yet courage needs to be awakened in us. Courage is the spark that can become the flame of hope, lighting new and exciting pathways in what seemed to be dead, dark landscapes.

JOHN O'DONOHUE

I had lined up a few initial poems and prayers for this series of 'Words' as the last round ended - I am struck by how many of these initial ones speak to the courage/light/darkness we are witnessing in Ukraine. These are not the traditional sunflowers being posted in solidarity with Ukraine, but rather Tithonia diversifolia (sometimes called Mexican Sunflower or tree marigold) that blanket the hills in a few areas in North Thailand in November and December.

3/5

WAITING TO GO ON
It must be
we are waiting
for the perfect moment.

It must be
under all the struggle
we want to go on.

It must be,
that deep
down
we are creatures
getting ready
for when
we are needed.

It must be
that waiting
for the listening ear
or the appreciative word,
for the right woman,
or the right man,
or the right one,
or even
the right moment
just to ourselves,

-we are getting ready
to be ready
and nothing else-

Like this moment
just before
the evening light
arrives
working
by the kitchen
window,

sensing
a deep
down symmetry
in every
blessed thing.

The way
that everything
unbeknownst
to us
is preparing
to meet us too.

Just on the other
side of the door
someone
is about to knock
and our life
is just
about to change

and finally
after all these
years rehearsing,
behind
the curtain,

we might
just be
ready
to go on.

From ‘Waiting to Go On’: in ‘River Flow:
New and Selected Poems’
© David Whyte and Many Rivers Press

My friend Pan who is as gentle with people as he is with this old beach dog on the beach in Pranburi, Thailand.

3/6

Be content to live an anonymous, unspectacular, misunderstood life among people...
Let Christ transfigure the darkness in ourselves & in the world.
Let there be great care to maintain the simplicity of presence...
Love what is obscure & little for there you will find Christ.

- Celtic Daily Prayer Book 2

Just downstream from the Maesagna waterfall, Maehongson 

3/7

When the mind is festering with trouble or the heart torn, we can find healing among the silence of mountains or fields, or listen to the simple, steadying rhythm of waves. The slowness and stillness gradually takes us over. Our breathing deepens and our hearts calm and our hungers relent. When serenity is restored, new perspectives open to us and difficulty can begin to seem like an invitation to new growth.

This invitation to friendship with nature does of course entail a willingness to be alone out there. Yet this aloneness is anything but lonely. Solitude gradually clarifies the heart until a true tranquility is reached. The irony is that at the heart of that aloneness you feel intimately connected with the world. Indeed, the beauty of nature is often the wisest balm for it gently relieves and releases the caged mind.

-JOHN O'DONOHUE
Excerpt from his books, Beauty: The Invisible Embrace (US) / Divine Beauty (Europe)

Words that have Sustained - Part 3 - Advent 2021

Advent again...grateful for this season...grateful that there continue to be words that sustain...grateful for the poets and artists and thoughtful humans who capture their feelings and words...the journey continues  - broken...blessed...given... in this journey of life, the journey of being human...(photos from my recent UK trip)

Flying over Ireland, into Dublin

Flying over Ireland, into Dublin

11/28

FOR THE TRAVELER

When you travel,
A new silence
Goes with you,
And if you listen,
You will hear
What your heart would
Love to say.

A journey can become a sacred thing:
Make sure, before you go,
To take time
To bless your going forth,
To free your heart of ballast
So that the compass of your soul
Might direct you toward
The territories of spirit
Where you will discover
More of your hidden life,
And the urgencies
That deserve to claim you.

- John O'Donohue

Excerpt from the blessing, 'For the Traveler'
BENEDICTUS (Europe) /
TO BLESS THE SPACE BETWEEN US (US)

South West Coast Path above Branscombe Beach, Devon

11/29

At any time you can ask yourself: At which threshold am I now standing? At this time in my life, what am I leaving? Where am I about to enter? What is preventing me from crossing my next threshold? What gift would enable me to do it? A threshold is not a simple boundary; it is a frontier that divides two different territories, rhythms and atmospheres. Indeed, it is a lovely testimony to the fullness and integrity of an experience or a stage of life that it intensifies toward the end into a real frontier that cannot be crossed without the heart being passionately engaged and woken up. At this threshold a great complexity of emotions comes alive: confusion, fear, excitement, sadness, hope. This is one of the reasons such vital crossing were always clothed in ritual. It is wise in your own life to be able to recognize and acknowledge the key thresholds; to take your time; to feel all the varieties of presence that accrue there; to listen inward with complete attention until you hear the inner voice calling you forward. The time has come to cross.  

From To Bless the Space Between Us, John O’Donohue longer excerpt here: https://sarasmeaton.com/thresholds-by-john-odonohue/

Edinburgh

11/30

You never really know where life will lead you, but if you live with pure intention and feed what you love with all your might, consistently and honestly...you might find yourself in places you'd never dreamed you'd go. - Laura Munson

https://lauramunson.com/my-happily-ever-after-what-ive-learned-from-writing-something-that-a-lot-of-people-read/

Exeter

12/1

This long and lonely path

That I walk upon

Is full of mystery

And hope, that one day

I shall find my way home

- Athey Thompson

Dartmoor

12/2

For all those who are walking in grief, who have lost so much, whether the pain and ache is current and acute or distant but still tender.
Solace is not an evasion, nor a cure for our suffering, nor a made up state of mind. Solace is a direct seeing and participation; a celebration of the beautiful coming and going, appearance and disappearance of which we have always been a part. Solace is not meant to be an answer, but an invitation, through the door of pain and difficulty, to the depth of suffering and simultaneous beauty in the world that the strategic mind by itself cannot grasp nor make sense of.

- David Whyte