India...incredible!

I have been back from India for just over a week. I’m still trying to sort out in my head everything that I experienced and I should sleep on it some more, but people keep asking what my time was like and I’m looking for a good answer. I keep thinking of two quotes that I mentioned in this post seven years ago after our first month in South Africa. I think they describe how I feel about my brief time in India.

“Traveling is a strange business. To have been in Khartoum is somehow more poignant that being in Khartoum. Being there involves dust, dirt, discomfort, noise, suspect food, dicey water and being homesick. Having been there is amazing. Memory, learning and mind weave together a cloth more fabulous than the indifferent roar of its traffic.”

“If anyone tells you African travel is easy, tell them they know nothing.
If they tell you it's not worth the effort, tell them they still know nothing.
If they've crossed the Nubian Desert pay them due regard."

 I had moments of great enjoyment and sheer amazement and a few moments where I had had enough. At one point I was quite ready to return to the US – something I have rarely experienced when traveling. I always want to stay longer and not return. But now that I am back, I find myself looking through my India guidebook, dreaming and scheming about what I would want to see when I return. Note that I said when I return. India’s siren call is beckoning.

Sign at the airport

And to be honest, I really didn’t see much of India at all (it’s such a large country it is often referred to as its own continent.) I didn’t see any of the sights that most tourists go to India for, but, I did see India. For a few days I was back home in Asia.  I was able to live and breathe the air, the warmth, the chaos, the sounds, the food...the incessant honking…

So here are a few highlights.

The main reason for going to India was to attend a wedding. Aroha and Peter were Andrea’s classmates at Duke and who also live here in DC. After attending Beth and Vincent’s wedding in Switzerland on our nine month wander around the world, we decided that if ever we are invited to a wedding overseas we will go. Unfortunately, this is Andrea’s busiest time of year at work and she was unable to go. So I went to represent!

Peter, Aroha and Aroha's dad at a pre wedding party

But wanting to justify flying away and leaving my wife at home, I was also able to spend a couple days working at my company’s office in Bangalore which is where I began my trip. While there I stayed with another of Andrea’s Duke classmates, Shailesh, and his wife Rohini who were so hospitable and welcoming into their home. I had not spent that much time with Shailesh while in Durham and not ever met Rohini, but I am very privileged to count this couple as dear friends now. I loved listening to them and learning from them. They put up with all my questions and helped me navigate a few places in town – as it seems like I had a string of bad luck getting taxi drivers who did not know where they were going. Anyway, highlight # 1 – Shailesh and Rohini. Rohini has just written Seasons of Trouble, a book about the Sri Lankan civil war that has received critical acclaim around the world.

Rohini and Shailesh at the wedding

 Highlight #2 – Meeting and spending time with my Workplace Options colleagues. Again, in addition to the work I needed to do, I was able to spend time just listening and learning, finding out about their situation and what life looks like for them. A special shout out to Vijeth who fed me lunch every day!

Vijeth and lunch

View of Bangalore from WPO's office

From Bangalore, I flew up to Dehradun (a smaller town of about half a million people about a five hour drive north of Delhi.) The plane landed briefly in Delhi and most people got off while the few of us continuing on to Dehradun stayed on the plane while it was cleaned and prepped for the next leg of the journey.  Aroha’s family generously put all of us out of towners up at a nice hotel for the festivities.

Highlight # 3 was meeting Peter and Aroha's family and friends who had come from all around the world to celebrate the occasion. Peter’s family and friends all went out for dinner the night we arrived in Dehradun and I just remember feeling so happy to be a part of a special group of friends and family. Those of you who know me, know that I am not a big dinner party kind of guy – but this group of friends and family, just clicked. I’ve been to enough dinners and get-togethers where there is a lot of silence and awkward moments – this was not one of them.

Peter and family and friends

Always time for a little cricket...

...until you need to set up for the wedding!

Peter and his family that came from the US

Highlight # 4 – The Main Event. The wedding itself. While there was a party and reception the night before the wedding as well as other pre-wedding ceremonies for both Peter and Aroha, the main event began Saturday evening when those of us representing Peter were driven a few blocks away from the hotel to where a white horse, a brass band, and an incredibly loud PA system was waiting for us. Our task was to be the parade and dance down the street announcing Peter’s arrival to the guests waiting at the hotel. To be surrounded by the band, loud music, and drums - oh and fireworks -was deafening and totally cured me of any residual PTSD that I carry with me. How the horse does it, I don’t know. I think it went deaf a long long time ago. And so we danced and moved ever so slowly to the hotel where the entrance to the lavishly decorated grounds was packed full of guests waiting for the groom's arrival. We pushed (or were pushed) through the crowd, being welcomed and blessed by one of Aroha’s family members and made our way down to the wedding site. And there we joined with hundreds of other guests, young and old, beautifully dressed in colorful saris of every shade, surrounded by pulsating music, lights, flowers and we waited for the bride's entrance. Eventually the music changed and Aroha walked in under a canopy of roses and went and met Peter up on a raised platform. I have never been a part of something so…I don’t even know the words to use.  Needless to say it was amazing. Incredible. Spectacular.  Truly.

Bracelets at the cocktail party

Bracelets and Henna

Pre wedding ceremony

The groom is dressed and ready to go...

...get on his white horse for the procession